Here’s your mission should you choose to accept it: hold you breath for a month, eat an entire salad bar, swim a marathon a day for 2 weeks, while figuring out how to get to a place you haven’t been to since you were a baby 30 years ago, without the help of signs, GPS, maps, helpful policemen or Google Earth, then at your destination mate non-stop for a few weeks, lay a few hundred eggs at night in a hole you dug with your back feet without looking, now swim back to where you came from to eat some more salad bars and get ready to do it again. Each year. For the rest of your life. Which is long.

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